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Wonderment…

Wonderment is an emotion that is comparable to a surprise but that is more when people feel when perceiving something very rare or unexpected.  Wonder is a feeling of surprised amazement and so is wonderment.  If you feel wonderment, you can’t quite believe what you’re seeing.  Nonetheless, it is real…can be touched, felt.  Maybe even heard.  Wonderment is what I have been feeling over the last 3 months with our daughter. It’s a wonder what occurs with a little one and the growing that takes place in such a short time span.

It’s been a while since I have written due to a move, Reagan crawling all over the place, play groups, teething, Gymboree, and the day-to-day activities that seem to make the weeks just, unfortunately, fly by.  I seem to be reminded more and more of the changes in Reagan.  How much she is growing and how much fun she is going to be as a toddler.  This is all true.  Indeed, she is growing.  Her face is changing.  The way she plays with her toys is a tad more gentle.

Albeit, the future will indeed be fun!  Her first birthday, her running around all over the place, the words she will say, the pictures she will drawer that I will hang on the fridge proudly,  her kindergarten graduation.  I am even excited to walk her down the aisle one day.  However, I am in no rush for any of that.  As a reminder from every other post that I’ve shared, I treasure every day and hold it very close to me. Our journey wasn’t a simple one and I don’t take one day with our daughter for granted. After all, I would be foolish to let myself forget that there was always that possibility that she wouldn’t be ours.  Many “positive” people in my life would disagree with my thought process of holding on to that.  Those people have never adopted so they cannot possibly understand.  Nonetheless, by holding on to that, it reminds me to cherish my daughter.  As well as to heed and take care of the way I parent.  And of course, to hold on to the wonderment of every moment that passes by.

I love the wonderment of waking her up every morning and clamping her mouth open to see if she has any teeth yet 🙂 The wonderment of her first crawl, her first pull to a stand.  The wonderment that she can finally reach out to her parents to be picked up.  The wonderment of how she looks at other people and things….especially nature!  Its amazing how one can find simple joy out of a leaf on a tree.  There is such wonderment in every moment with Reagan.  Especially that of her laugh and smile.  Nothing like it in the world.

So, there is no rush for me.  Let her take her time in growing up.  She has forever to be a toddler and and certainly forever more to be an adult.  She can be carried a little longer in her Papa and Daddy’s arms. Not having to run.  Just be an all gummy, babbling baby for a tad bit longer.  There is plenty of wonderment in the future.  For now, I choose to hold on to todays.

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Easter, 2014

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