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Contractions are painful…

…and has harsh as it may sound, it’s about time she’s feeling them! We are well passed the due date and have been overwhelmed by emails, questions and texts, wondering what is happening here in the back of beyond! It has been a very frustrating and depressing few days but finally we have made our way into the hospital waiting room, the birth mom has been induced, and the show is about to begin


We walked in at 9pm last night to find a very giddy receptionist who looked as if she was going to start crying out of pure happiness when we told her why we were here and who we were visiting. It’s amazing how far the world has come when looking at gay couples adopting…even here in “god’s country”.

When we arrived at the OB wing, the nurses station was already prepared for our arrival with more smiles. They brought us to the birth parents room and we spent much time with them. They have her on morphine and a sleep aide to assist with some of the painful contractions she is getting as well as to sleep through much of the pains. I guess the idea is to sleep until the last possible moment, get the epidural, and push. You ladies are getting lazier and lazier 🙂

It’s now almost 6am. We ran back to the hotel for about 2.5 hours to rest a bit. Our company does give the BM some reassurance and eases some of her anxiety, so we do feel its best to stay here as much as possible. Besides, we certainly don’t want to miss anything and she is getting closer. She has invited us into the delivery room, and if she still feels comfortable at that time, we do plan to be there.

No one really seems to get that my anxiety is aimed more towards when she needs to sign the termination papers than today’s birth. Today is a day to be excited over, not nervous. And when today comes and goes and we go back to our hotel tonight thinking of how wonderful a day I KNOW it will be, I’ll have to go to bed tonight worried that she won’t sign. Deep down, I know she will. People will read this and say I am being negative and not to concentrate on that. Once again, those same people, while they speak from the heart and want the best for me and I adore them, have never adopted. I have read story after story of failed adoptions. Statements that birth moms have said to adoptive couples (same statements that I have heard) only to have them retracted when it comes time to sign. The advice I have taken to arm myself with is to remind myself over and over is that this child is not ours until she signs those papers. Very hard to do and I’ll let you know how miserably I fail at being able to do that. Good news is that the faster this precious baby is born, the more likely the attorney will show up tomorrow with the paperwork.

To finally have made it to this moment, is surreal, joyous, sad, curious, wondrous. I have a good feeling it will all come together in an overwhelming flood of emotions when I tell my partner to peel out of the hospital driveway as fast as he can when we have our daughter in our arms and this is over! 🙂

By the way, great way to kill time while in a waiting room….



5 thoughts on “Contractions are painful…

  1. So proud of your patience and honesty. Truth is, none of us know how you are feeling right now, but we can totally empathize with the mixed bag of emotions. You wouldn’t be human otherwise. My prayers and support as you face the last hurdle before your precious daughter is yours. I have never doubted the exceptional parents that you and Brian will make. This baby couldn’t want for better. I love you to the moon and back and know deep in my heart that you will be joining the ranks of sleepless parents tomorrow.

    And by the way….you deliver a watermelon! Not lazier….smarter!!!


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